I just want to find something I love.

Everyone I work with, except for Colleen, lies.
I never really picked up on it until now.
I am missing $5 our of my cup. I know who took it but I cannot confront her because she is the bosses daughter, plus I have no proof other than I know the two other women working that day wouldn't take the money!
Then the one person I didn't think would start shit for her own pleasure likes to spread rumors.
I can't trust anyone at work now. I am on my own.

Is everybody like this? I already have a difficult time dealing with people since I wait on such idiotic people at the restraunt.
I don't know. I am just real sick of immature people.

Maine. I love you.
My family. I love you.
Sangria. I love you.
Rock Band 2. I love you.
Lake Cobesseeconttee. I love you.

I made a delicious Crumble Coffecake yesterday. The cake came out perfect! I would perfer a more moist crumble on top but I just warm it up in the microwave and it does the job :]

Aaron and I had a little grill time yesterday too. It's so nice to live in an apartment where your landlord isn't crazy! And whats better is we have a huge backyard! We must have grilled over ten times since last summer, it's awesome. I am Miss Plain Jane with my Filet Mingnon and Aaron always has something different each time. He's made some Spicy Chicken Burgers with Jalpenos, Serranos, Onions, Garlic and such... to die for. Last night he made some Chicken Kabobs with a marinate of various spicy peppers, garlic, onions, some of his homemade salsa... tasty!

He is such a pepper whore! He has lots of peppers growing in the yard with some basil on the way. His salsa is just so yummy. Hot but not too hot. Though he LOVES his salsa/anything with peppers to be super hot, the kind of hot that it makes him cry! He has gotten me into actaully enjoying the taste of a pepper, not just the heat. I've learnt and grown alot with him.

Anyways it is quite hot now and I've been cleaning for the past hour... time for some coffecake.

I never thought the time/days/weeks/months/years would fly this fast. It scares me sometimes.

I watched Lolita the other day. James Mason was amazing. I found it to be interesting, not my favorite but it was interesting. He definetly was obsessed with her. I felt bad for him. Lolita just used him. Eh. I enjoyed Peter Sellers alot, I've never watched any of the Pink Panther movies but I loved him in Lolita.

I feel so silly wanting to go see The Time Travler's Wife tomorrow. I want to go to the first showing they have haha. I know it probably won't be the same as the book obviously but oh how I wish they could film each page exactly how it was written.

I've been trying to upload all my Incubus pictures but they are huge so it will take a bit before I post some of them.
I got about 3 videos too! The sound is amazing and the video is..wonderous. I had a blast! I can't believe I saw them again. Our seats were amzaing! The pictures do them some justice but our seats were literally less than 10 feet from the bass player Ben.

The set list was the best EVER! They played atleast 2 or 3 songs from each album! I couldn't believe it! They played a "Certain Shade of Green"(mycrazyicon) & "Redefine" from the S.C.I.E.N.C.E. album! They even played "Warning" which is one of my favorite songs. I was screaming my heart out...
I got two shirts. I figured why the hell not. One of them fits me perfect! I've worn it almost every day haha I have to chop the other one up so it'll fit me better.

yes.

I am now reading The Time Traveler's Wife and it's real good so far. The movie previews looked so romantic so I just had to give in and read the book.

Ben is no longer at Mackie's with us. It's sad. But he's on to bigger and better things now. He deserve it. I just built a good friendship with him and it sucks having to lose a friend. he's moving to Salem so it's not like we're not going to be friends.. it just sucks. Now I think work is going to be more stressful with him gone. He was like the 3rd owner. He made the food fast and tasty. Atleast Colleen is still here. Tuesdays were the best. Ben, Colleen and I. We would laugh and just be silly. I'm going to miss it.

I have a heat headache.
Aaron & I are going to see Incubus on Saturday at the Comcast Center. I've never been to a concert with him so it should be interesting. I just get anxious going to new places with him. Plus, he cannot drive so it puts more pressure on me. I hate feeling this way because I know he feels terrible that he can't drive. I love him, it just gets hard sometimes. But I can't give up on our relationship just because he cannot see. But anyways! I am excitied to see Incubus for the 2nd time. Even though it's just a greatest hits tour it's still INCUBUS!!


So if you could, can you fill this out for me pretty please if you are on my f-list. I borrowed this from serade_black. It seemed like a nice idea to get to know everyone on my list. :]

1. Can you cook?
2. What was your dream growing up?
3. What talent do you wish you had?
4. Favorite place?
5. Favorite vegetable?
6. What was the last book you read?
7. What zodiac sign are you ?
8. Any Tattoos and/or Piercings?
9. Worst Habit?
10. Do we know each other outside of lj?
11. What is your favorite sport?
12. Negative or Optimistic attitude?
13. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me?
14. Worst thing to ever happen to you?
15. Tell me one weird fact about you:
16. Do you have any pets?
17. Do you know how to do the macarena?
18. What time is it where you are now?
19. Do you think clowns are cute or scary?
20. If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be?
21. Would you be my crime partner or my conscience?
22. What color eyes do you have?
23. Ever been arrested?
24. Bottle or Draft?
25. If you won $10,000 dollars today, what would you do with it?
26. What kind of bubble gum do you prefer to chew?
27. What 's your favorite bar to hang at?
28. Do you believe in ghosts?
29. Favorite thing to do in your spare time?
30. Do you swear a lot?
31. Biggest pet peeve?
32. In one word, how would you describe yourself?
33. Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same for you?

Finally seen HBP. I enjoyed it alot.
( Spoilerish )

I might go see it again... maybe.

The world is nothing that I thought it was or could be.

I want to live in my dreams.

I am going to the cape for the first time in my life tomorrow. You would think living so close(2 hours) to the Cape I would have by now, but my family has always been a Maine family. Aaron's family on the otherhand grew up on the beach/the Cape. His Grandpa owns 7 cottages in North Truro a stones throw to the beach. His brother Matt and younger sister Libby are going to be there with their families, so will his Mom and Aunt. I'm a bit nervous having never spent more than a day with his family, but I think everything will go great. Aaron rarely sees his family so he's excited.

I am becoming quite the expert on making cinnamon rolls. I've experimented with a few things by accident and they've turned out to make a tasty recipie. I made a bunch for father's day since my parents have never gotten the chance to try them and they LOVED them. So I'm not sure if I should try to sell the rolls at work... or on etsy. I'd rather sell on etsy just so I wouldn't give my bosses money for having to sell thru the resturaunt.

It's amazing how the months go by so fast now that I'm getting older... It's almost July! I have to get cracking on my cinnamon roll business.

rip Michael Jackson & Farrah Fawcett.

It's odd to think I can go down to the liquor store and buy some alcohol.

Today is the day.

Aaron got me such great gifts. I love my boy. He got me a poster of the Verse from Firefly <3
-The Complete Patsy Cline Collection
-I songbook with 8 of her songs that you can sing along with.
-A Serenity RolePlaying Game Book.
-A Sudoku Rubix Cube (grrr I'm going to go crazy with that thing)
-Really nice stainless steel measuring tablespoons/teaspoons & odd sizes like 1/8tsp.
-The Cookie Companion Cookbook from King Arthur Flour (drooling)
-A fucking Screen Printing Kit!
& a bouquet of flowers and balloons! haha I loved the balloons!

Just waiting for tomorrow night now. The Flats! Here we come :] Strawberry Magaritas & salsa yummm.

I am turing 21 in ten days. I know I already am 21 in my mind, but I'm going to be that older person to alittle kid. I always looked up to my cousins when I was little and thought, "Wow your old. What's it going to be like when I'm 21?".

1980's Madonna kicked so much ass.

Aaron and I have alot of dreams, we just procrastinate. We could fulfill our dreams and live such a great life, we just need to put our minds to it.

I need to call my brother. I've been taking alot of Saturdays off work already and he wants me to go with all his friends to Foxwoods or Mohegan Sun for his late late Bachelor party. I really am not the gambling type... I told him I needed to work because I'm going to be taking off all the other Saturdays for all the weddings coming up. He seemed fine with it, but Dad told me was really wants me to go. I was pissed he didn't fess up and tell me he wanted me to go. It didn't seem like a big deal to him so I thought everything was ok. I don't know what I'm going to do, maybe I will go if I can take it off but who knows.
Aaron doesn't think I should go, but he thought I shouldn't have been Ryan's Best Man. Grr. That always upsets me. Of course I am going to be my brothers best man, HE ASKED ME TO BE. That was one of the best talks I have ever had with Ryan. I will most likely have Ryan as my Made of Honor, who the hell cares for tradition anymore?

This post is beginning to get hostile so I will stop before I get to mad.

On another happy note I watched The Fifth Element(mm'm'mm gary) twice this week while I was baking. I made a Cinnamon Nut Coffee Cake & Chocolate Chip Cookies. I love watching movies/Firefly while I bake.
I also watced The Dark Crystal last night. I cannot believe I didn't have nightmares when I was younger. The Skeksies are so scary/freaky. What an amazing movie though especially for a children's movie. It's one of my favorite movies.

Off to pick up Aaron in 20 minutes. It's so nice being only one minute from both our works.

It's so nice to be able to watch Star Trek: Deep Space Nine again. Aaron & I have been watching a few episodes a night.. without stupid SPIKE! commericals. DS9 is definetly my favorite Star Trek, but I still enjoy all the others. I never got to watch any of Star Trek: Enterprise so I can't really say if I like it or not...

My brother's 29th Birthday is Sunday. I cannot believe he is going to be 29!! I still have to find him something..
I think that Ryan & I are going to start to Screen Print on tshirts and sell them on www.Etsy.com
I am going to start alittle baking company and sell some brownies, cookies, coffeecakes, and breads. I'm really excitied about this. I think this is the thing I have been waiting for.
My brother & I were brought up to not be satisfied with going into a building everyday. Both of us are very creative, but we just don't have the focus. I think that if we both push ourselves & work together we could accomplish something great.
This is definetly what I needed.
& yay my birthday is in 29 Days!!!
I have to get my lisence in order so I can go out and have fun on the 30th... oh joy the RMV.

Going to see Dirty Dancing at the Opera House on Saturday. It'll be a girls night out because my Nana, Mom, Aunt Linda, Aunt Chris, Jill, Lisa and I will be hitting the town... kind of. The play is at 2pm and then after we are going out to eat. I'm excitied :] It'll be nice to get out and travel, even if it is only to Boston.

I officialy hate my boss. He is the most selfish human being I have ever known. I cannot stand selfish people who only think of themselves first.
It's called TEAM WORK. I was so pissed off at him I came home & made pancakes.

I've watched two movies off of Netflix. I absolutely love being able to watch movies off the website straight to the TV!!!!


I wish I could sing like Patsy...


Now I am just waiting for the Presale to start for the Incubus concert August 1st. I am just dieing to go to this!

So I just pre-ordered Incubus' greatest hits album. but wait for it.......
on 4 LPs!!!!!!
It'll be so nice to hear Incubus on a record. <3
& even better I am signed up to get early ticket sales for when they come to Foxboro August 1st.
I've been kicking myself since the last time they came around because they played at the Axis or the Avalon which are both kind of small places. That whole tour was supposed to be initmate and close with the band. what the balls!
But now I am excitied. Incubus in August.
The greatest hits album doesn't come out until June! hahaha It has two new songs & some covers they did so it should be pretty neat.

I need a new job. I hate my boss. I need a new life style.

I wonder what it would be like to be buzzed & high? I'd probably get sick.

Jack + Daylight Savings= Not the best idea ever.
I've never been hung over but this morning was awful. I woke up at 4:45am because of the damned Daylight Savings and couldn't go back to sleep even though I went to bed around midnight. Tried to fall back to sleep didn't happen because of some ducks in my back yard. What are ducks doing out when it's dark outside!?
Went to sleep on the couch because I thought I was waking Aaron up. Got to sleep from 7:15 to maybe 9:45. I had a dream I was dating Gerard Butler and then he changed into a football player and we were surrounded by his family... very odd.
I felt like I was still buzzed when I was making breakfast. We really do not need Daylight Savings Time. lame.
But after breakfast I watched Zack & Miri Make a Porno. I enjoyed it. It was really funny. It was nice to watch a movie that looked funny AND was funny. Unlike Tropic Thunder. Don't get me wrong, Tropic Thuner wasn't terrible, just wasn't what I thought it would be. RDJ was awesome though, he was a black man.

Going out to dinner tonight with my brother and his wife. I haven't seen him since christmas. I miss him :[

very sleepy. I got atleast 3 full hours of sleep lastnight. I believe I have an anxiety problem. I've always had this growing up. I thought I learned not to get nervous over silly things... but I still do. I am more confident, therefore I am not as nervous, but with the snow storm lastnight I couldn't stop thinking about having to drive through the snow to get to work. I was set on the fact that I wouldn't have work (which I did) so I was thinking about that as well. Maybe I am just nervous about new situations.. although whenever I have to get up an hour earlier I don't sleep as well, I think the alarm clock won't go off since I had to change the time on it. It's stupid to worry and to think about things to much. I guess thats what happens when you have an avid imagination, your mind is constantly turning out situations that could occur and yet it would be a million in one shot if it did.

I need to get into some new music. I need a new sound to fill my brain.

( Legalize Marijuana To Get the USA Out of Debt )

Holy crap. I bought a Wii. & Wii Fit.
So much fun. So addicting. The tennis game that comes in the sports package is my favorite. My right arm is going to swell up soon from playing so much tennis.
I love the Wii. It's just like playing the real sports... you get to move around & not sit on the couch! That is what I love most. I sweat playing a video game, that's awesome.
I am really happy Aaron & I bought it. He cannot use it, but we shall see if I can get him to bowl or play golf.
New favorite food= Pork Lo Mein from Quan's. omg it's delicious.
& I made a Devils Food Cake the other night, so it's a good thing we got the Wii.
Off to work.... :\

I've been in a huge Firefly kick lately. I even nicknamed my Wii Console Serenity.

I was sick over the weekend. Stupid head cold I got from my Monday dinner with madre.
Went to the my parents house, my padre & I saw The Wrestler while my mom went to my cousins daughter's 3rd Birthday. Mickey Rourke deserves an Oscar for his performance. I cannot picture anyone playing The Ram like he did. I really believe that he was made for this movie. If he didn't leave acting years ago to pursue boxing he wouldn't have looked like a real wrestler for the movie. I loved it. Go see it if you can & you should.

I loved going to the movies again. I haven't been since August. When I was growing up my family & I always went to the movies. We were a huge movie family. I guess I stopped going because of Aaron. Then again I didn't think any of the movies coming out have been worth seeing. I would like to see Revolutionary Road before it leaves the theater though...

Aaron & I went halves on a 37" Vizio LCD TV. He doesn't need it, so its pretty much all for me, but our old TV was dieing so we did need a new one. I love this TV. We watched Transformers Monday night. It looked AMAZING.
Now I want to watch all my movies over again on the big screen hehe

ugh Monday night was kind of crazy. Our friend Kurt was over. We all split a bottle of Jack Daniels and he pretty much drank half of it. Aaron had 2 glasses, I had one, and Kurt had atleast four & half a beer. I just feel bad for him, he needs an escape and all he has is drinking. I love Kurt but he has no control over his drinking. Aaron & I don't know if we want to have him over anymore. By the end of the night he couldn't even speak clearly, pissed all over our bathroom floor, and slipped trying to go to his car. Worst of all he drives home to North Providence like this! I cannot believe it. But he's been driving home like this and worst for years. It's sad.

I made cookies over the weekend. I cannot believe how good they are. They are small Chocolate Chip ones so you can eat like 3 of them. :]
Just made a loaf of bread. I love the smell of anything home made.

Anyways, I need to go to school for something. I need to get my ass in line and figure my life out. What do I want to be?

Whenever I take some sort of cold & sinus medicine I always overdose. Obviously not to the extreme but I shake, my heart beat gets faster, and I feel like I'm in a dream. I'm starting to think maybe I should take a children's cold & sinus medicine. I mean I am the size of a 12 year old.

I think it is funny that some of my favorite Beatles songs are the ones that my least favorite Beatle sings.. Paul. It's because of George Martin though... I love any Beatle song with strings in it. He did amazing work with the Beatles.

I really do not feel like going to work tonight. I feel like crap. I have a weird cold. It started with a sore throat, then I got a stuffed up nose/coughing, but other than that I really don't feel sick. Almost like bad allergies, but ever since I took that damned cold & sinus I feel like shit. I just want to lay around and watch movies. & snuggle.

I cannot wait for the TV!

I fell into a Hedwig mood lastnight. Wow, it's been awhile since I've listened to Hedwig <3
I missed her. I love everything Hedwig. The music is the best.